[[Girl with black hair stands in the frame, talking to the reader]] Girl: I'm sure you've heard all about this sordid affair in those gossipy cryptographic protocol specs with those busybodies Schneier and Rivest, always taking Alice's side, always labeling me the attacker. Girl: Yes, it's true. I broke Bob's private key and extracted the text of her messages. But does anyone realize how much it hurt? Girl: He said it was nothing, but everything from the public-key authenticated signatures on the files to the lipstick heart smeared on the disk screamed "Alice." Girl: I didn't want to believe. Of course on some level I realized it was a known-plaintext attack. But I couldn't admit it until I saw it for myself. [[Girl places her hands on her hips]] Girl: So before you so quickly label me a third party to the communication, just remember: I loved him first. We had something and she tore it away. She's the attacker, not me. - Not eve. {{title text: Yet one more reason I'm barred from speaking at crypto conferences.}}

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