[[A man is sitting at his computer. Facebook sidebar messages appear on the top of each panel, with a user photo and a few lines of text.]]
Facebook: Susie
Reconnect with her
(phone icon) Send her a text
Man: Come on, Facebook. I know I shouldn't.
Facebook: Susie
She'd come over
(bed icon) You don't have to fall asleep alone.
Man: It's been so hard to stop. But she's falling for me, and I can't keep getting her hopes up like this.
Facebook: Susie
Life is complicated
(icon of stick figures embracing) She's so warm against you. You both want it.
Man: (pulling out phone) Maybe if I just make it clear it's not going to be a thing ...
Man: Yeah, we'll just have a talk.
Facebook: Susie
Oh yeah. Mmm ...
(webcam icon) Leave your webcam on so I can watch.
Man: Okay, this feature is getting creepier and creepier.
{{Title text: An hour later: SUGGESTION: LICK HER NIPPLE MORE.}}
Warning: this comic occasionally contains strong language (which may be unsuitable for children), unusual humor (which may be unsuitable for adults), and advanced mathematics (which may be unsuitable for liberal-arts majors).
We did not invent the algorithm. The algorithm consistently finds Jesus. The algorithm killed Jeeves. The algorithm is banned in China. The algorithm is from Jersey. The algorithm constantly finds Jesus. This is not the algorithm. This is close.